You can make a difference

We probably can't change the world, or wipe porn off the planet forever, but we can make a difference for someone...

Here is another great story:

The Starfish Story
adapted from The Star Thrower
by Loren Eiseley (1907 - 1977)

Once upon a time, there was a wise man who used to go to the ocean to do his writing. He had a habit of walking on the beach before he began his work.

One day, as he was walking along the shore, he looked down the beach and saw a human figure moving like a dancer. He smiled to himself at the thought of someone who would dance to the day, and so, he walked faster to catch up.

As he got closer, he noticed that the figure was that of a young man, and that what he was doing was not dancing at all. The young man was reaching down to the shore, picking up small objects, and throwing them into the ocean.

He came closer still and called out "Good morning! May I ask what it is that you are doing?"

The young man paused, looked up, and replied "Throwing starfish into the ocean."

"I must ask, then, why are you throwing starfish into the ocean?" asked the somewhat startled wise man.

To this, the young man replied, "The sun is up and the tide is going out. If I don't throw them in, they'll die."

Upon hearing this, the wise man commented, "But, young man, do you not realize that there are miles and miles of beach and there are starfish all along every mile? You can't possibly make a difference!"

At this, the young man bent down, picked up yet another starfish, and threw it into the ocean. As it met the water, he said, "It made a difference for that one."

The Truth Shall Make You Free

When a person makes mistakes it can sometimes feel easier to cover the truth with excuses, deviations, or flat-out denial. Sometimes this gives a false sense of security and rational, temporarily allowing an avoidance of consequences. In the long run, this can cause a deeper impact or harm than the original act. Truth can be painful and difficult to bear on many levels, especially when the fear of discovery and harsh judgement or rejection from others looms largely overhead. That can seem impossible to face.

Many times in my first marriage I pled with my husband to tell me the truth. However horrible it was, I was certain I could deal with it much better than the lies. He couldn't find the courage to do that. When I finally did find out the truth about his pornography addiction, the catalyst it was in his repeated infidelity, it was too late to save our marriage.


How many times have we told our children, "You'll be in less trouble if you tell the truth?" Why do we say that to them? I know for me despite how upset I am when my children have done something wrong, if they tell the truth a portion of that frustration immediately dissipates like air leaking through a pin hole in a balloon.

It takes courage and faith to face the truth that someone we love is struggling with pornography, especially if it is our spouse. I know how horrible that sense of betrayal feels--but wouldn't it be easier to deal with if he was completely honest? Have you told him? Can you look past your pain and help foster an environment where he is less afraid to open up?

John 8:32 KJV And you shall know the truth and the truth shall make you free